Seven sins of sandwich: Greed

From Laurence "the lush" van Camp, The Gravy

“I just wish I had less money,” said no one, ever. Materialism is a hard vice to deal with. Of course we want to enjoy the comforts of living in the 21st century. But when did a second drawbridge over your castle’s moat become a necessity? The more we have, the more we want; it’s the human condition.

So, a pretentious wanker of a burger is in order for the grand finale in the Seven Sins of Sandwich. This is the popped-collar, Dad’s Bentley driving, trust fund baby of burgers. It is so rich! Using ingredients I would never usually cook with, let alone use all at the same time feels so frivolous. We got wagyu, we got foie gras, Iberico jamon, truffles and a shit load of GOLD to cover this burger in. Decadent burgers have become as common as Aperol Spritzes on Instagram, so here’s one more to pollute the world with excess.

the $100 gold burger

You will be looking at handing over around $150 for two servings of this burger. All this shit is really fucking expensive and sometimes hard to come by. So if you’re feeling the pinch, substitute any of the following:

Wagyu mince for beef mince (40% brisket, 40% flank, 20% fat FTW)

Iberico jamon for prosciutto ham

Foie gras for chicken liver paté

Golden buns…Just use regular buns FFS!

Truffles are hard to get, so a truffle cream from a deli will keep on loving you well after this meal for about $20

For the truffle Aioli

1 egg

1 clove garlic, chopped and sautéed

1 teaspoon lemon juice

1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard

1/2 cup olive oil

1/4 teaspoon of salt flakes

1/2 teaspoon shaved truffles

Method

  • Using a mortar and pestle, smash the garlic and salt.
  • In a large bowl, mix the egg yolk, mustard and lemon juice, then add the smashed garlic.
  • VERY slowly, add the olive oil, whisking constantly, until the mixture emulsifies.
  • Add the shaved truffles and stir to balance.

Cheats demi-glace sauce

Knob of butter

1 small brown onion, roughly chopped

2 red shallots

3 cloves garlic, roughly chopped

1 stick celery

1 carrot, roughly chopped

2 tablespoons parsley

2 bay leaves

1 tablespoon rosemary

1 teaspoon peppercorns

100ml red wine

120ml port

500ml veal stock (or very high quality beef stock)

2 teaspoons cornstarch mixed with some cold water

Method

  • In a large sauce pan on a medium heat, melt the butter, then add the onions and shallots and stir for a couple minutes, then the garlic for a further minute, stirring throughout, then all the vegetables for another 5 minutes.
  • Add the wine and half the port and let the alcohol burn off, for about 5 minutes.
  • Add the stock and bring the heat up, until it’s boiling, then drop it to low and let simmer for about 30min, or until the mix has reduced to a third. Then let cool.
  • Mix 4 tablespoons of the demi-glace with the cornstarch in a glass.
  • Once you've cooked your burger pattie, drain most of the fat from the pan, then add the remainder of the port and scrape any tasty shit out from there. Then add the demi-glace sauce and cook for about 2 minutes, then stir in the cornstarch mixture and cook for another 2 minutes.

For the rest

200 grams wagyu mince

1/4 teaspoon salt

2 slices gruyere cheese

50 grams Iberico jamon

1 40 gram disc of foie gras (duck or goose)

4 large red onion slices

Butter for frying

Milk bun

Sesame seeds

Gold dust and a brush to apply

Method

  • Cut the bun in half and butter the insides.
  • Paint That Shit Gold All over! You might have to do three coats to make it look really legit.
  • Paint the sesame seeds gold too.
  • Heat the oven on grill to 150˚C
  • Mix the wagyu and salt together, then separate into two wide and flat patties.
  • In a hot buttered skillet, fry the patties for 2min each side, then transfer to a paper lined baking tray, cover each with cheese and grill for 5min.
  • Cook the onion rings for a couple minutes, don’t go overboard, just don’t put them on the burger raw, 1 - 2 minutes should be fine. Set aside.
  • Add a little more butter and sear the foie gras on each side for 1 minute.
  • Time to make this burger!

 

  • First, line the bottom of the bun with that aioli, then a burger patty with cheese, then a little more aioli and some jamon. Then another burger patty and some more jamon. Damn, that’s looking good innit!
  • Now place that foie gras upon the jamon, then the onions and now spoon your demi-glace all over it… Yehhh all over it… Bun upper now goes on top and sprinkle with golden sesame seeds.

Wow, that’s some burger you have there. Best you go hide away in your vault and enjoy the spoils of your decadence; like me, you’re probably broke now.

For more tales of excess and livin' large, visit Laurence's site The Gravy